I feel like locking myself away in this tiny cell. A place where I can't hurt anyone, or even hurt myself.
I'm always so tempted to walk away because I know I'm easily replaced. You'll miss me for a bit- but beautiful, wonderful people are a dime a dozen- and they'll be much better than me.
I want to leave everyone, and walk away. I'm not sure if I can take the stress of starting Repo again. Because now, I have to re-audition. Audition against all these beautiful and talented people. I'm neither of those adjectives.
Everywhere I'm go I'm not even second best
Stuck last, far behind the rest.
I have no talent. I can't sing- though god I wish I could. And my acting is mediocre. But I'm trying- I really am. I just have this barrier called "Lack of having a car" and "lack of money"
But no one will hire me because I'm a loser. I'm worthless. With no potential and no hope.
Abyss.
So now, I'm off to bed. I'll be listening to melodic music that I'll never be able to re-create, by gifted artists I'll never match.
What's my selling point? What's the attraction?